i changed my vibe and lost all my friends

Hi everyone, Swetha here!⁠

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I mean, we really shouldn’t be surprised when this happens, right? We attract folks according to our vibe, and when shifts happen within us OF COURSE the vibe changes, and OF COURSE the attraction changes. Sounds simple but when you overlay that with humans and our feelings, here comes the complexity! (Yay! Boo!)⁠

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Why did your vibe change?⁠

Was it necessary?⁠

Was it out of your control?⁠

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If you needed to shift something or a shift happened, that is the way life goes as human beings grow and move through life and relationships. The price we pay is that we can’t hold on to everyone/everything we collect as we grow and move through life. With each personal vibe change, and changes in relationships, there is grieving that probably needs to happen. Grief is not just for death and dying - grief is present in all our losses. It’s an opportunity to mourn, reflect, and appreciate the stuff that makes life real. ⁠

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It feels horrible. I know.⁠

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When it comes to losing friends, mourn the loss, reflect on the reasons, appreciate where they have carried you. If your vibe feels true to you, the lost folks were a part of the journey but not the destination.⁠

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Sending you all good vibes!⁠

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-Swetha⁠

// Originally posted on Instagram on January 21st, 2023.

i had a crush on you in session

Hi Everyone, Swetha here!⁠

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Ooof! Awkward!⁠

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I can honestly say this is rare in my line of work because most folks come in for counselling when there is something they want to work on, and typically that’s not crushing on their therapist. ⁠

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However, I want to approach this statement to discuss BOUNDARIES. Sometimes folks really don’t see why I (and other practitioners like Heidi) can’t entertain these types of vibes. Speaking for myself, when I am in my therapist mode, I am deeply in my work. While I carry who I am with me into my work, I am focused on holding space for my clients. Lack of professional boundaries “contaminates” the therapeutic space and hinders healing. ⁠

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This is also why client/therapist relationships are governed by professional associations and their codes of ethics. There are a lot of “rules” when it comes to contact I can have as a therapist with my clients. ⁠

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What about practitioners who are not part of an official association per se but are still maintaining those strict professional boundaries? To that I say, YOU HAVE GOT YOURSELF A GOOD ONE. Enjoy that safe healing space. ⁠

Crush elsewhere. 🙃⁠

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Sending you all good vibes!⁠

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-Swetha⁠

// Originally posted on Instagram on January 18th, 2023.

are you an artist too?

Hello Everyone, Swetha here again!⁠

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YES! ⁠

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I am totally an artist!⁠

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If we go down the “did you go to art school” route, yes I did. I have my BFA, which I basically switched into on a gut feeling after losing steam on science courses I was taking - so I am all for that!⁠

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However, it took me a long time to call myself an artist. My art is very personal and sometimes I am not comfortable sharing. This became very apparent to me when it came time to display my art at school. We learn that art can be so many things in art school but it took me some time to figure out my Art doesn’t need to be on a wall, and my art can be teaching others to find their own artistic groove, or better yet - as a modality for healing!⁠

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Also, I’m currently re-processing the euro-centric and colonized definitions of artists. There are so many ways art shows up for us and in us. There are so many parts of me that always were grounded in art, but they wouldn’t be recognizable as “being an artist” without a decolonized perspective. I want to end on that note: if we can pause learned judgment we can find there is an artist/art in all of us!⁠

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Sending you all good vibes,⁠

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-Swetha⁠

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// Originally posted on January 12th, 2023.